Unlearn the Lies You Have Learned as Children.

When you were a kid, you learned hundreds of things and several of them are lies. Unfortunately and thanks to your naivety, you started believing all of them including those lies. You may be believing a few of those lies even now also. If you want to know real facts, you have to deactivate those beliefs. What should you do for deactivating them? You should unlearn the lies. Let us look at some of the lies you might have learned and that you must unlearn. 

1. A big lie about happiness.

You may have been led to believe several things. Here is a classic example. Elders and parents, though their intention is not malicious and they want to genuinely protect you, may have led you to believe that if you study well and pass your examinations in flying colors, you can come up in life and earn well. So, when you do your schooling, you study hard and score high grades. Are you happy? You think you are. After your schooling, you enroll yourself in a reputed university. But due to various extraneous factors, you are not able to score high grades in your university examinations. You are not happy now. But where is the happy feeling you experienced when you scored high grades in your school? It seems to have evaporated and vanished into oblivion because you are not able to experience it anymore.  

What does this mean? If you think that you can be happy or will be unhappy due to an event, a person, or an experience, you are terribly wrong. On the contrary, it is how you react or respond to a person, event, or experience that decides your happiness or unhappiness. Further, if a particular thing or event seems to make you happy, you cannot assume that it will last forever. You will chase another event or thing with the hope that it will make you happy. So, it is evident that chasing happiness is an endless journey in which there is no destination. To put it differently, you need not search for happiness externally. It is "within," which means you have to train your mind suitably so that you can be happy whatever may be the circumstances. 

2. "Can't do" lie.

As a kid, you may have been told "you can't do this," "you can't do that," "It is not possible for you," and so on. In fact, you may have heard these lies several times. You have to unlearn them because they can be highly demotivating. As T. S. Eliot said, "People exercise an unconscious selection in being influenced." So, the lies you had been told have been influencing your actions, decisions, and behaviors. That is the reason you are not even attempting many things. The result is that you are missing out on several opportunities. 

But how to unlearn these lies for the good? You should develop a new attitude and it is popularly known as the "I-Can" attitude. Whenever you face a tough situation or an issue, you should ask yourself "what are the various ways to solve this situation or issue?" This means that you should shift your focus from your inability to solve the issue or situation to your ability to find solutions for issues. Amazingly, this approach will get you the desired result. 

On the other hand, if you continue believing the lies, your mind will automatically focus on "failure." By doing so, you will be increasing the chances of failure. 

3. Approval of others is important.

Among all the lies you may have learned as a kid, this deserves getting placed at the top position. Unfortunately, many of us are hard-wired to believe that we and our actions need validation from others. This lie can be a huge roadblock to your success. It can rob your peace of mind as well. So, dig deep and examine what such validations may cost you. If they cost you success or happiness, it is high time you stop giving importance to approvals from others. 

There are several such egregious lies you have to unlearn. Find them out and free yourself of the limitations and shackles of these lies. Remember that you cannot afford to continue believing such lies, however small they may. As the American proverb says, "Small leaks sink the big ships." So, do not believe lies regardless of their size or magnitude. Do not let the ship of your life to sink.