A 5-Star Habit That Can Catapult You To The Success Stratosphere.

Every one of us has spent years and years learning how to communicate but alas! we have learned only to speak or write. Does effective communication consist only of speaking and writing? The fact is that there is another very important element in communication and that is LISTENING. Have we learned how to listen effectively? Truly speaking, effective listening is one of the most essential habits that can help us succeed in all our endeavors. This 5-star habit can catapult you to the success stratosphere. Why and how?

What is the purpose of effective listening? The simplest reply to this question is we can understand others or the things they speak about. We all know that there is a world of difference between hearing and listening. When we just hear, we do not imbibe or 'take in' the content in what we hear. On the other hand, when we listen intently, the content gets registered in our minds. This means we understand.

The reality that can be uncomfortable to most of us is that we want to be understood first before we understand what others are trying to communicate. Perhaps, that is why we have a tendency to interrupt when others speak. This means that we do not listen for the sake of understanding but we listen for the sake of countering the speaker with our replies and proving that we are superior, more virtuous, or smarter than them. So, even when the speaker is talking, we start mentally rehearsing how we should counter her by putting forth our points. The pathetic truth is that we refuse to realize or have no courage to accept that we are committing a mistake. Hence, we are not ready to address this conundrum.

According to experts, there are four types of listening. The first one is just hearing when the other person is talking and pretending to be listening. This pretension is best described as a byproduct of hypocrisy and deception in unfiltered form. The second type is selective listening. Most parents do this when their children speak. The third is attentive listening. This is better than the first two because you try to "take in" the message the communicator is trying to convey. The last one is very important and the most effective and it is known as empathic listening. Developing the habit of empathic listening is certain to take you to great heights, especially if you are an entrepreneur or if you are holding a position in which you have to influence the decisions of people. 

What is empathic listening? Experts estimate that the words we speak convey only 10 or even less percentage of the information we want to convey. The sounds we make convey another 30 percent and our body language conveys the rest. This means that in empathic listening, you use your mind, ears, eyes, and whole body to "take in" the message the speaker tries to convey. 

The best benefit you can derive from empathic listening is that you provide the speaker with what is called the "psychological air" they need to open up still further. To elaborate, when you do empathic listening, you do not probe, evaluate, or judge the person. On the other hand, you convey to the speaker that you sincerely want to help her. She may need help with making an important decision or solving a problem, or she may be seeking a bit of advice. In empathic listening, you are just putting yourself in the shoes of the speaker and looking at things from her perspective. 

Empathic listening has much more to offer. We may need a lot of training or effort to develop this habit. But the fact remains that it will do a world of good and lift us to great heights if we use it in every sphere of our lives including our career or entrepreneurial journey.