Tips To Correct The Bad Behaviors Of Your Pre-Teens
Kids may generally not be regularly disrespectful. But if you find that your kids show disrespect to you or other adults on a routine basis, don't delay taking action. Make them realize that you won't tolerate this. But don't snub your kids in front of the visitors. Once the visitors leave, tell your kids that if they continue with such behaviors, you won't be allowing them to play their favorite games or watch the TV shows they like.
Further, as a parent, you must be a role model for your children. If you avoid back-talking about others and if you show respect to everyone, your kids will also learn from your behaviors.
Treat your kids with respect. This is also important. If you bully them, they will also learn the habit and may try to bully other children or even adults. Thank your kids profusely when they help you. You must thank them even if they do small chores like getting you water, etc.
Some kids behave defiantly and may not listen at all. Never forget that children do not like authority. So, when you suggest something or give some advice in an authoritative tone, you will observe your kids are not listening at all.
You must therefore discipline the kids then and there. Make them understand that you do not view their behavior kindly. Tell them that if they don't listen to you, they may lose their privileges like playing with their friends or watching their favorite TV shows.
Another problem you may find with your kids is being ungrateful. If greed also accompanies this, they may start thinking they are entitled to have whatever they want. This behavior may be due to your fault also because you may have got your kids whatever they want. Kids must understand life and that they can't get everything in life.
Never encourage this behavior. Instead, develop in them the saving habit. If they want something, let them save money from the monthly allowance you give them and get the item with your approval. Teach them the value of gratitude. Educate them that by helping others, they can derive immense satisfaction. Be a good example and they will learn from you. Tell them constantly that they should get satisfaction from what they have and must not complain about what they do not have.
If your kids throw tantrums like screaming or shouting, make them realize that this behavior is not acceptable. They may be frustrated but they must express such frustrations differently. They should not show disrespect or lose control when they face such situations.
When your kids exhibit such behaviors, put them in a room and allow them to come out only after they calm down. Once they are ready to listen, talk to them and make them understand that these behaviors will not get them what they want. Tell them also how they should behave and handle frustrations. Teach them the good effects of taking a good and deep breath. When their brains get a good amount of oxygen, they can learn that better choices are available for them.
If you suspect that your kids are lying to you, find out if there are any specific reasons for this. They may speak lies for safeguarding themselves from troubles or may do so as an imaginative play. Tell them they should stop this habit forthwith. If you make them realize that lying may land them in trouble, they will stop this habit.
Similarly, kids should learn that they should not cheat others, be it in sports or in games. They must realize that fair play will earn them good name and they will be able to have good relationship with their friends and others. Tell them that if they speak lies or cheat, their friends may desert them soon.
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